i was a writer before, at our high school newspaper. i enjoyed writing about stuff, about my feelings, about my friends and families and also my experiences and dreams. until, some teacher pressured me into writing better articles and it put a lot of pressure on me. there is a lot of weight on me becoming the editor-in-chief that i just lost interest. that teacher changed my perspective about writing, it became a burden, a work, a responsibility. it was no longer a hobby that i enjoyed.

but thankfully, it’s all coming back to me now. my love for writing is coming back to me. i can express myself fully. some people uses music to express themselves,others uses paintings, but me.. i feel most comfortable sitting by my desk, with my laptop, writing here on my blog about things that happened, things that i want to do and experience and things that i love.

i wish today that i can fully develop my skill in writing, i know i have the it, i just don’t know if i still have the guts to show it to the world. back then i was so happy that my articles are published on the school newspaper, but now, i feel like i just want to keep it to myself. i hope that i can have another opportunity to write for the whole world to read. i think that can really make me happy

but i think that is gone now. i feel so depressed that i sometimes think that nobody cares for me any more.

as you already know i am a big fan of kpop. that includes korean music, dramas, movies, actors and actresses even variety shows. i’ve finished a whole list of dramas you can name, i know all the latest gossips and news about my “idols.” well, as you can see, i’m uhhh.. a little obsessed.. okay quite! obsessed but i know sooner or later i have to control it. why you asked? it is because, i’m flunking my subjects and it is not a good thing!!

so now, i have to stop.. nope (i can’t).. uhmm, minimize my time in watching this shows. i have to focus on my studies and drive myself to success!! hahahha

as if!.. pfft..

i know it would be hard for me to stop this craziness, but i have to try! i have to change! i now know why people say that it is much, much more easier for people to say things but harder to put them into action. i’ve said the sentence ‘i have to change’ a thousand times but until now…

okay, to make it easier for me i’ll try to make a checklist:

1. drink 10 glasses of water

2. do crunches

3. 2-3 hours of internet surfing only! (a must)

4. do not start a new kdrama!!

5. sleep longer

6. study your lessons

7. pray (topmost priority)

i now it’s not a lot, but it’s hard to go against from what i’m used to do. usually i only drink about 3 glasses of water a day! i know i’m killing myself but i don’t like drinking water, it makes me feel stuffed. but i have to try.. i have to if i don’t like to die from colon cancer, dehydration and other illnesses.

let’s stop at that for this post..

join ourworld!

who does he think he is to take a lot of lives in just one day? lost of work is not that big of a problem that can’t be solved. a lot of people doesn’t have work but they continue living in a respectable manner. no underhanded tricks are needed to survive. God will always provide. not only did he just condemned himself but he also caused a lot of suffering. two nations are involved. the worst thing that could happen now is for war to erupt between Philippines and Hong Kong.

i’m really concerned now on our ofw’s working so hard in Hong Kong. they are now looked down, insulted and others are removed from their job. what is happening is not fair, but i understand the feelings of both parties. i admit, because of what happened, i was somehow ashamed for being a Filipino, but what can i do? no matter what, i can’t alter the fact that it is in the Philippines where i was born.

i love my country. i really do, but as everyone says nothing’s perfect. And Philippines is far from being perfect, but even so there are still a lot of things to be proud of.

i pray for the lives of those who died in this hostage drama and also for the soul of the hostage taker. i pray for the survivors, for them to obtain the healing power of God and for them to have hope inspite of their lost. i pray for the safety of all people around the world, that nothing like this would ever happen to them. i pray for peace to reign and for God to touch people’s heart.

okay, so the subject matter is about some celebs being anti- Christ of whom i may name a few are lady gaga and rihanna. we don’t know for sure that they are really satanist or of some kind. they haven’t admitted anything but some people, maybe professionals, have spotted things that can be proof that they really are in their music videos. i’ve seen those videos myself and heard the words in their songs that spoke of satan when played backwards. i’ve also seen the signs i.e. lightning sign, illuminati, goats, patterns and dance steps that are present in Lady Gaga’s videos. and in my opinion there are too many to be simply coincidental. i was really creeped out yesterday after watching videos and reading articles regarding this. i can’t seem to believe that there really are people who believes in satan and how these celebs uses media to somehow worship him.

but who am I to judge them and to say that they are what we think they are?? i’ve read articles about these and it just irritates me more. arguments here and there, people uttering nonsense things that are wrong and commit sins because of these. i know that we have the freedom of speech but it’s getting overboard. we are given this right but in return we have to respect others.  our opinions especially in the religion department, should be thought well so we’ll not offend other’s. but who in this generation is thinking about this?? well as i see it, there are very, very few.

some says that people are just over thinking and sees things wrongly. and i respect that but what had gotten into my nerves is that they say its “bullshit” and that there is no God and for the concerned writers who just want to inform concerned citizens to “shut the hell up.” where’s the justice in there?? don’t they have the same right as them to express their opinions?? and what’s with the words?? is there any need to say harsh words?? they can say what they want to in a nicer way. and as for the God issue, i just want to shake them up and yell in their ears “hello?? wake up!!” are they blind, deaf and whatever? did they just think everything just sprouted out of nowhere? the trees, birds, sky,water, air, people, you and me? there’s got to be a greater being than us to be able to do these things. even the first thinking people on earth realized that.

i am very fortunate that i got to know God from the start. i may have my doubts on things but i never, never doubted that there is God. and i thank yesterday for knowing these things, they opened my eyes on some of reality’s secrets and my faith in Him has been stronger than before. i can’t do anything for those who don’t believe in Him only to pray for them.

so,, what’s up in my life now?

hm,, let me think..

1. i’m so bored that i die from boredom every single stinking day!

2. i am officially a nat sci 1 repeater. [it sucks!]

3. prussian is no longer a mate! [still a friend but not a blockmate]

4. i am suffering from a hard-pounding headache

5. gosh!  i am such a slow reader this time. it is annoying!

is this life or what? i know that life is unfair, it’s bound to be that way to make stronger but.. duh! it feels like a dementor is just outside my window.

*FYI: dementor- is a hooded creature that sucks the happiness out of a human. from the famous book of harry potter.

other than these things, i am happy to inform everyone that i enjoyed my sembreak. this of course includes our high school get-together  that happened last october 23.

as expected of the matthew section, this event was a blast! boy.. i missed them terribly! we talked and laugh and enjoyed each other. it’s just so amazing to think that the past is not forgotten. the bond that we had became stronger.

now that i am starting a new semester of my college life, i’ll try not to be irresponsible as before and that i’m gonna give it a nice shot though not my best.

i know! i’m pathetic am i? nice shot? huh! i just don’t feel like pressuring my self to give my all.. if you know what i mean.. still i think i’m going to be better that before.

okay okay! i know what you are thinking, that my attitude is all wrong about study stuffs but i’m not that bad in the academics department, if i may say so myself. so butt off!! lol..

p.s. these thoughts and my attitude may still change now that it is college and all. let’s all be hopeful and pray that blessie[yours truly] will be able to pass 2nd sem with flying colors.

so long my beloved doodledust. i’ll write again when there is time and when i feel like it.

xoxo

what is our problem guys? bat tayo nagkakagulo? when was the last time we saw each other ?hindi ba natin namimiss ang isa’t-isa? ewan ko lang sa inyo pero ako miss na miss ko na kayo.

imbis na masasayang gm ang nareceive ko ay parang galit ang lahat pag napaguusapan ang reunion? wala namang namimilit sa inyo na pumunta. pinopoint-out lang ni jeff and ate my na baka ito na lang ang time na available ang lahat  para magkita kita. once lang to. naiintindihan naman nila na talagang mahirap ang buhay ngayon at hindi lahat tayo ay may pera, kaya nga magmimit bukas para pagusapan ang lahat. magagawan naman ng solusyon eh, basta lang willing ka ring tumulong. everything is negotiable [konek?] hehe..

di ba matthew tayo? san ba kilala ang section natin? di ba sa pagtutulungan natin? kase united tayo! hindi lang kaingayan at sa pagiging masayahing section tayo nakikilala ng lahat. kaya guys patunayan natin na matthew parin tayo.

once a matthew always a matthew!

xoxo

kim hyun joong belongs to a k-pop group ss 501

check out their songs!

ss501 group

he is the one with the green shirt..

am i going to repeat nat sci? hell all over again? oh please, i am so sick of this subject. brain, please don’t let go of the little things you’ve learned! please..

if only i can beg the heavens to please work on a miracle..!

nakakadepres!!!!!

xoxo